September 29th, 2007 (06:55 pm)
current location: a casa, con kitten
current mood: blah
current song: Beck, the information
I’m in one of those blargh moods. I feel like that is the perfect word to describe it. It’s the feeling of frustration and blah-ness that you can’t get yourself to do much of anything. Your movements are static. The hours slowly pass. You have much to do but can’t seem to motivate yourself to do any of it. All of your friends are working or away meandering in their evenings with their roommates while your own mates seem to have become figments of your imagination. Yea, that’s kind of it.
Strangely when in said mood, one would tend to be lacking of words. Thus is true. However, if you put a keyboard in front of static fingers, they seem to have a mind of their own. So I’m sitting here. With kitten. The window’s open and there is that fall, October-ey air coming through, full of its fall October-ey scents of leaves and rain and something indescribably fall-like.
What I really wish I was doing right now? Walking through an apple orchard or the bobali gardens. Or at a haunted house. You know, those dim nights where you’re all bundled up in a sweatshirt, walking around with a few good friends. Crunching through the leaves. I love the fall, and I love doing those fall things. Even though I’m allergic to apples and all. I just really want to be outside!!! Blargh. And I’m not. And I can’t get myself to. Because I’m very, very sloth-like right now.
Why is everyone busy! Ahh. I have this problem where I can’t work ahead on anything. I’m so deadline driven it’s terrible. I feel like I’m wasting free time when I do it before I really need to. I don’t know, there’s probably something wrong with me in that regard.
So anyhow, I wish I was in Italy right now. Maybe that’s why I feel so out of place right now. My mind is back on another continent. Floating about all droopy-like on a clock in a Dali painting. Don’t worry, there’s no need to understand my mindless banterings. I just wish I had some fellow banter-er to hang with right now. I’m so unmotivated to even call a fellow human being. I love when things just unfold in front of you effortlessly. And if you were said, fellow banter-er, what would I do, say, hey- want to sit around the house and mindlessly toss about words and ideas and giggle at the cat and possibly go out and jump in heaping leaf piles? Oh, I wish I had someone to do that with. I realllly really wish I had someone to do that with. And I wish these jeans weren’t so tight on the waist! Ha. There’s a precious little bundle of fur and ears and tail curled up on my bed. Golly gee is she cute.
Well that’s enough. My mind feels accomplished now. It’s been a while since I’ve written. Oh journal, you collection of words you. I’m glad we got to bond like this. Ha, okay so I’m weird. I like this song… #7 ba da da da da ba da da-a.
Hm. Okay, away to the grocery store i guess. Maybe I’ll go get some coffee and sketch. I’ve got a few hours to kill… ta ta.